He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
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