i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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