ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
no you cant smoke seaweed
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
