Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
3 2 1 whiskey
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
