bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
