My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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