there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
