Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I yelled at your uterus for you.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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