scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
