Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
