I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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