we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
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