Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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