Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize