i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
