You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
