The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
