His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
