I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
