hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
