I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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