i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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