We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
