i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize