who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
