It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
