It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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