I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i just sent this text using only my big toe
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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