woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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