I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
