I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
