I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
