There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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