Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
