gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
