Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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