And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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