And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
