I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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