Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
