i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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