I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
