whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
