no, he came in my armpit
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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