...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Me too!
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It's never too late to be topless.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
