I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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