Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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