Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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