so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
my sisters under your porch take her home
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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