ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
