i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
